Did you come to stare or wash away the blood?
by rawwrasaurus
Summary: rated M for intense language and future boysexx. please read and review!frerard.
1. Chapter 1

**Frank's POV**

It all starts with his eyes. Glowing beautiful green orbs, practically boring into your soul. So heart-achingly innocent, yet so painfully scarred. Two eyes not meant for this cruel life; although I know he makes the best of it however he can.

Once tearing yourself away from his glistening eyes, one wanders subconsciously to his raven black hair. No matter how many days it goes without a comb 10 feet near it, it looks almost elegant, disheveled in the most perfect way.

His voice is a chorus of angels singing. Am I the only one that hears it? Just being around him should be illegal, because it's a pleasure beyond any high you could possibly imagine.

And I couldn't stop staring at him.

"Frank?" He said, looking so beautifully confused. After about a second of delayed reaction, I looked away, feeling a rush of heat to my face.

"uhmm, yeah?"

"Missed your cue." He sort of half-laughed, which made my brain stop working for a second. When it started again, I realized I was still holding my faithful guitar Pansy, and that we were at band practice. I also failed to notice that Bob, Ray and Mikey were also in the room with us.

"Uh, oops," I said, fumbling with my pick, "Sorry, let's start again."

The rest of the practice went without event, but I think the rest of the guys might be onto me. While keeping my eyes focused on my chord formations for the remainder of the time, I could almost feel their accusing eyes burning a hole in the back of my head.

After practice, as I was starting to walk away as fast as I could, I was suddenly grabbed and turned slightly around.

"Hey" It was Gerard. I could feel my heart start to bang against my rib cage. "Is something wrong? You seemed a little off today." I hesitated, actually considering for a moment telling him how I feel right then and there

"uhm.." I stumbled, trying to find words, while absent-mindedly, my eyes drifted to his hand, still resting on my arm. He suddenly realized I had noticed it and quickly put it back at his side. "Nothing" I said shyly, looking down. "I'm fine." But he could still sense something wrong.

"You sure?" He asked, "there's nothing wrong with you and Jamia?"

"Ugh," I groaned with the mention of my girlfriend, Jamia, I looked at Gerard then and for a second I thought I saw a ray of hope in his eyes, but as soon as I thought I saw it, it was clouded over by concern. Finally, I sighed.

"No, there's nothing really wrong, but…" I trailed off for a while, then finished in all seriousness, "I think I'm gonna have to end it with Jamia." For another second, I thought I saw the gleam of hope back in Gerard's eyes, but again, it was quickly disguised.

_Don't get your hopes up, _I told myself, _he's got a girlfriend, too, duckweed. It's never gonna happen. _

"Oh my God, Frank, why? You guys have been going out for three years!" Gerard exclaimed.

A lot of excuses came through my head. Three words, that's all I have to say. "I LOVE YOU" I screamed in my head, knowing it wouldn't be able to stay there much longer.

"Someone else." I finally said briskly, then suddenly turning and quickly walking away, leaving that someone else totally oblivious in my dust.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Gerard's POV**

What could he possibly mean by "someone else"? He and Jamia have been dating for 3 fucking years, there _is_ no one else.

_Unless…_

_No._ I said to myself, hitting myself on the head to shake away the thought. I knew frank was bi, but he wouldn't ever like me like that. I'm just his best friend, the singer in his band. There's only a really small chance…

_But a chance none the less._

"fuck, no!" I slapped myself in the face, the sting temporarily distracting my thoughts on the matter. I got up from my bed and sauntered over to the mirror. I glared at the face staring back at me. "remember the last time you let yourself hope?" I yelled at myself. "That's when he asked out Jamia. Didn't you learn then?"

I've liked Frank for four years in counting, but I could never tell him. And it's not like we would ever be accepted by society anyway. So what was the point? Just when I was about to go to the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face, I heard my cellphone ring from inside my back pocket. I unwillingly pulled it out and checked the caller ID. "Lyn-z".

Shit. I had forgotten about my own girlfriend of about 1 ½ years. Just another reason why I shouldn't hope in the first place. "Hello?" I answered, sounding surprisingly exhausted. I guess I had had a long day.

"Hey, Gee!" Was her peppy reply.

"Hey. How's it going?"

"Pretty good. Getting ready for tonight. Yourself?"

Tonight? Shit! What had I forgotten now? Oh no, please don't tell me it's already - "You know…" She cut into my thoughts. "Our 1 ½ year anniversary?

Oh, fuck. I was supposed to take her out to dinner tonight.

"Well, duh," I said. "How could I forget? I've been looking forward to it all year!" I convincingly said. When I wanted to, I could lie flawlessly. I could hear the smile in her voice as she responded. But knowing Lyn-z, I could feel something a little off, maybe even wrong. But what she said next totally destroyed all those thoughts.

"Good. And I just called to tell you that Frank and Jamia are going to come with us, too." My heart suddenly took on the role of "broken jackhammer"

"What? Why?" I asked, maybe a little too hysterically. I was getting worse and worse at hiding my feelings for Frank, and I just knew dinner was the worst possible way to help that.

" They figured because their 3-year is just around the corner anyway, that it would just be more fun to have our celebrations together. Don't you think so?"

"Uhm..yeah…sure…of course." I said, suddenly feeling the undeniable urge to look presentable. While still talking on the phone, I dug around my hopeless mess of a room and finally came upon what resembled a hairbrush.

"Love, I have to go, Mikey's on the other line. I'll see you tonight." I didn't wait for the routine "I love you" and "goodbye", but instead quickly rushed to the bathroom to get that cold water, and maybe a shower while I was at it.

**Frank's POV**

"What?"

"For the third time, Frankie, We're going out to dinner with Gee and Lyn-z for a combined anniversary dinner. What's wrong with you today?" I stared dumbstruck at my girlfriend of 3 years. I got the almost overpowering urge to dump her right then and there. What was she trying to pull?

But I knew I couldn't dump her. I really physically couldn't. I don't think I'd be able to handle it…and not for the reasons you might think, either…There are some things I just don't tell people.

"oh. Okay. Sorry, I'm just a little bit out of it today." Jamia raised her eyebrows.

"I can tell." She then closed the few steps of distance between us (I winced expectedly) but then kissed me on the cheek. "Happy anniversary, babe. Feel back to normal soon." I bit my lower lip. That wasn't supposed to be a suggestion. It basically meant bad things would happen if I didn't get back to normal…

"Thanks. I will." I warily walked up the stairs to my room and looked in the mirror.

Great. Now I have to look presentable. I had already showered earlier that day, so I guess all I needed to do was get dressed and find a hairbrush. While I put on the uncomfortable tight fitting suit and pants (I really needed new dress clothes) memories sort of unwillingly flipped through my head.

It was three and a half years ago when I had realized I'd fallen in love with my best friend and the lead singer of my band. I remember the exact moment I knew like it was yesterday. Me, him and Bob and Mikey were playing capture the flag in Gerard's basement, using my misfits shirt as a flag. Me and Bob were on a team, and Gerard and Mikey were on another.

"You'll never get me alive!" I yelled, running around the room. I was being chased by Mikey and Gerard, while bob was calling "Frankie! Frankie! Pass it over here!" I threw the T-shirt at bob, but almost a second after I did, I was tackled by Gerard

"GRAAAWR!" he yelled and pounced on me like I was some kind of deer, his prey.

"Geraaarddd! Get off me! Bob has the flag now!" He laughed, still refusing to move from on top of me.

"Yeah, but maybe I'll just keep you as a hostage!" now I was laughing with him, squirming under him, trying to get free.

"NO!" bob screamed dramatically, "You can't take my Frankie!" We were all practically in hysterics, not a care in the world.

Then, I was almost successful in getting out of Gerard's grasp, when he pinned both of my arms around my head and looked me right in the eyes. Those gorgeous hazel eyes staring straight through me. My heart starting beating like crazy and blood rushed like lava through my veins.

_Shit…_ I thought. Neither of us said anything until Gerard then said mischievously grinned, giving me a little wink, and said

"Then surrender!"

Of course I knew he was bi, and we had kissed and made out a couple of times (just to make a statement against homophobia) but I knew I couldn't tell him how I felt. If he didn't feel the same way, what if something happened to the band? The band was still always my first priority. It saved my life, gave me a reason to live; it was like therapy for all of us.

"Frankie?" I heard Jamia call outside my door. I sighed, making the final adjustments to my tie. Good old catholic school. At least one thing you taught me stuck.

"Yeah?" I finally replied, grabbing for my brush.

"Babe, we're gonna be late, let's go!" Paused in mid-air, I decided I wouldn't have time to brush my hair. I sighed again. It's not like having nicely brushed hair will win over Gerard.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Gerard's POV

I was being too much of a girl tonight At every red light, I would look in the mirror and fix my hair to make it perfect. And at the next stopsign, I would look again, and to my dismay, a single strand of hair would move a fraction of an inch, causing me to fret just that much more. It's a good thing that no one was in the car with me. Lyn-z had decided to meet me there, because she needed something or other from the store. I think she said pick up a prescription or something.

As I pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant (fancy place. Could've gotten valet parking if I wanted) and parked my car, I ended up having to stay in there, bent over the steering wheel hyperventilating. I got hard just by _looking_ at frank. Wishing he could mine, wishing I could tell him how in love with him I am, wishing to describe that frerard to me wasn't just a statement anymore, but an excuse just to get close to him… I started to hyperventilate even more. I couldn't do this. I _knew_ I was gonna mess it up somehow.

In a fit of panic, I reached for my keys and was about to shove them back into the ignition when I heard a soft knock at my window, which made me jump.

"Gee?" The voice said, muffled behind the closed window. I recognized the voice as Frankie's, and nearly started to hyperventilate again, but instead, forced a reply.

"Frankie?" I said. My voice was shakier than I thought.

"Gerard, roll the window down." Frank laughed.

"Oh yeah…" I muttered, already feeling like a moron. This was going to be a long night.

With shaking hands, I attempted to get the key back into the ignition to try and open the windows, but I failed. So instead, I just opened the door, putting on my best "everything's okay" smile.

"hey frank." he hesitated a little looking me up and down. Was he checking me out? Or approving my outfit? I quickly did the same. Probably couldn't tell in the dark, anyway.

I nearly started salivating when I looked frank up and down. He probably had the most tight-fitting suit I had ever seen. His shirt and pants fitting on him so it was practically another skin; and it seemed like the sleeves were just long enough so he could cross his arms without ripping the jacket. And of course, his tie was perfect, even in the dark I could tell. He learned at catholic school.

"Hey Gee." He finally replied, seemingly tense. Suddenly, I looked around.

"Hey, where's Jamia?" I asked, finally noticing his girlfriend's absence.

"Oh, she went inside to get a table. Where's Lyn-z?"

"had to pick up a prescription or something. She said she'd meet me here."

"oh…" he said. After a few minutes of awkward silence, I spoke up.

"Guess we should go in, then, huh…?" Just from knowing Frankie too well, I knew he was biting his lower lip and looking down at his shoes, as he always did when there was something on his mind. He didn't reply. "Frankie?"

"hmm?"

"Frank, is there something wrong? It's fuckin cold out here, and if you choose to stay out here rather than somewhere _warm_ and with _food,_ then there's gotta be something serious going on." I heard him chuckle a little, then sigh.

"Hey Gerard?" He said, stepping closer, until his body and beautiful face was just merely and inch from mine. I could feel my chest get tight and my head start to spin. "That someone else I was talking about…" His eyes were piercing my own, such a deep brown you could get lost in them. My breathing got a subtly heavier. _shit_, I thought, _I'm never gonna make it through the night like this…_

"Yeah?" I said, looking down, trying to avoid his eyes. His face. I didn't know how much longer I could take without just kissing him.

He took a breath.

"What if I told you that-"

"Frankie? Gee?" Both our heads snapped up at Jamia's voice. I flashed another look at Frank, the light coming from the door exposing raw fear in his eyes. What was going on that I obviously didn't know about?

"Yes?" And exasperated Frank called back.

"I got the table, guys! Now come on, it's cold there." Lightheaded, I walked beside frank to the door, our hands briefly brushing together, but to my surprise, neither of us bothered to move our hands away.

When we got to the table, we ordered our drinks and made small talk, while I was trying my best to forget about the incident at the parking lot. We had just ordered our food when Lyn-z called.

"Hey, where are you?" I asked. I was a little bit concerned. Even though I wasn't the least bit interested in her romantically, she was still a good friend to me. I heard a sigh from the other line.

"Gerard…" She said warily. "I've gotta make a confession." _shit_. _What was this?_

"What is it?"

"I'm not really at a store, picking up any prescription." I hesitated, showing an obviously look of confusion on my face, silencing a small laughing fit between Frank and Jamia, over some unknown joke.

"Then…where are you?" I asked my subconscious already knowing what was coming.

"Gerard…I'm seeing someone else. I have been for the last three months." I let my jaw drop, earning me questioning looks from the other two.

"Wha-"

"Just listen, Gerard, okay?" I could hear her voice begin to shake.

" I know what's been going on. I've noticed how you haven't been looking at me the same way, how we've hardly been on dates recently, and-and-I don't k-know who the f-fuck you have feelings for , Gerard, but it shows, it fucking does! Because I c-can tell when you look into my eyes, y-you just don't see me, you see…s-someone else!"

"N-" I started to protest, tears welling up in my own eyes.

"Just listen!" She practically screamed. She was sobbing at this point. "His name is Bert, Gerard, and he treats me right. He treats me like he loves me, and when he looks at me, I can tell he sees _me_, and not some other girl!"

"But Lyn-"

"Gerard, I'm leaving. I'm leaving you, this state, I'm leaving it all behind me. I've wasted to much time on you, on everything here. Goodbye, Gerard. Tell Jamia I love her and thank her and Frank for being such amazing friends.

Then she hung up.

No longer able to hold them back, tears overflowed my eyes. She cheated on me. For three fucking months. I couldn't believe it. My vision clouded and blurred, I stood up from the table and ran toward the bathrooms.

"Gerard!" I hear Frank call behind me. I ignored him and ripped open the bathroom door, but ended up tripping over my own feet and crashing face-foreword to the ground, not bothering to pick myself up.

"Ger--shit!" I heard Frank say before he tripped and fell right on top of me, the door slamming shut behind him.

_Shit. This night just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?_


	4. Chapter 4

**Frank's POV**

I had no idea what was going on. I don't know why Gerard suddenly left, I don't know why he was crying- all I was aware of was my body on his, his breath on my face, and my hands on the cold tile the only thing holding up my weight.

Why is it that whenever I'm around Gerard, my heart always seems to be actually audible in my head? Not to mention something else I won't share…

Neither one of us were talking, just staring at one another, our lips so close, that a single movement forward would cause them to collide.

"Gerard…" I whispered

"what" he whimpered back, hot tears on his cheek, his voice shaky and breathing hard. His breath was absolutely intoxicating, rendering me speechless for a moment.

Not being able to sustain my position much longer, I got into a position where I was straddling him, our hips knocking together in such a way that is made me suppress a sharp intake of breath.

"tell me what happened."

Like he was under some sort of spell, he told me about everything; the phone cal, Bert, how she was leaving, and her suspicions of him and there being someone else. By the end, we were both in the corner of the bathroom. I was holding him, while his head was buried in my chest, weakly clinging to the fabric of my shirt. I rested my head on his while he sobbed into my chest, and when he finally settled and looked up at me with those broken hazel eyes, I still only had one burning question.

"Well, Gerard…" I said cautiously, "_is_ there someone else?"

He looked right into my eyes, subtly clutching me tighter, closer- but like I would notice. I was too lost in him. Seconds or minutes may have past in that position, him not giving me an answer, and me totally oblivious to the fact that I knew the answer before he replied with one swift motion.

Gently pushing me to the ground and getting on top of me, Gerard kissed me; softly at first, but when I started to kiss back, longer and harder.

Started to trace the outline of his bottom lip with my tongue, he then granted me entrance to his mouth. He tasted like beer, cigarettes and…Gerard.

Our tongues played with each other frantically, hungrily, never wanting this to end, and at that time, it seemed like it wouldn't. Magic, fireworks, nothing would be able to explain it. But it was the most amazing thing I've ever experienced.

Deep inside me, I knew that this was no onstage frerard. As our faces pulled apart, I was gasping for air, having never been kissed like that before, and while Gerard pressed his forehead to mine, he whispered,

"well, there is now."

"Gerard…" I said, all too aware of his body still pressed to mine and the fact that he had started to straddle me now and began to kiss up my neck. I suppressed a moan with great difficulty and repeated myself when he didn't respond "Gerard?" I said between clenched teeth.

"Yeah?" He said, his lips moving against my neck. That was it. I let out a gasp and my back arched in ecstasy. _Holy shit, I want him._

"Gerard, you're the other person and I've loved you for 3 ½ years!" I said it all at once and when he put his head up with an astonished look on his face, I kissed him hard, our tongues already in each other's mouths. I rolled us over so that I was on top of him again, and still kissing him passionately, I started to unbutton his collared shirt, after of course seductively undoing his tie (smirking while doing so) and throwing it across the room. Tracing my finger along the contours of his chest, I felt him shiver and moan inside my moth, causing me to do the same.

Just when I started to grind on him, getting a very pleasurable response, I heard a knock and the door.

"You boys done in there?" I heard a man with a thick southern accent say. We stopped and both looked at the door. "I just had a water drinkin' contest, and this is the only damn toilet for three blocks!" I cleared my throat while I stood up. I noticed I didn't have a shirt on and my jacket was strung over the sink. Had I missed that part? Hmmm. Another sharp knock at the door.

"Come on! I know you're in there!"

This guy's accent was too much. While Gerard got his shirt back on and started to pathetically stumble with his tie, I cleared my throat again and did the best impression of a southerner I could.

"Now, ya'll listen up," I said, getting repressed laughter from Gerard. "I got a bat up in this water closet, and mind you, I know how to use it!" _water closet? _ I thought to myself, _We're in America, Frank!_ Wow. I was really out of my mind tonight. Although, how could you blame me? My head was still buzzing like crazy, I couldn't be happier at this moment. "Now," I continued, "Either you just go use that women's bathroom right across the hall, or hike your ass up the three blocks to the net men's room!"

Gerard was keeled over now, just about to explode with laugher. I smiled at him, he was so damn cute. At least I had made him forget about Lyn-z for the time being.

**Gerard's POV**

I couldn't believe what had just happened. Well, not the hole southerner part, that was all to characteristic of Frank, but that amazing kiss, and he said he had loved me for that long? It was almost too good to be true. Frankie tiptoed over to the door and pressed his ear to it. Giving up on my tie, I simply shoved my hands in my coat pockets, laughing hysterically.

"Frankie, you're fuckin' amazing, you know that?" I laughed. He giggled adorable, which made my heart leap in my chest.

"No biggy. I just don't have much of a liking for people who interrupt me like that." He flashed a smile at me, which quickly turned to mock shock.

"Gerard Arthur way!" He said, supressing more laughs. I was suddenly embarrassed, head rushing to my face.

"What?" I said. Frank walked over to me.

"This is the most pathetic excuse for a tied tie I've ever seen!" He laughed, bringing his hands up to fix my tie. I sighed dramatically.

"Frank, you're such a drama queen!" He finished, then looked up at me with the most irresistible puppy dog stare I've ever seen. My eyes grew wide with sheer terror. I would do anything just to get that fucking look off his face.

"Holy shit! What is it?!"

"You called me a drama queen!" I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"Well, love, that's because you are." I could see his eyes start to water. _Fuck!_ He was good.

"Agh, fine, what do you want?"

"Take it back!" I sighed.

"Fine, I take it back." He smiled.

"now kiss me."

"But Frankie! Jamia is going to wonder what…"

"pleeeeaaaseeee, Gee?" I could tell he was holding back giggles, his hands hiding his mouth. Fuck. I loved him. I took his hands away from his mouth and replaced them with my own. Soon enough, I couldn't _get_ enough.

I wrapped my arms around his waist while he entwined his fingers in my hair. I pushed him up against the wall and started to grind a little on him, putting him through what he put me through . I smiled and laughed a litte when he started to gasp and squirm under my touch.

"Geraaard!" I started sucking on his neck, biting just a little. He failed to keep back a moan, and clutched me closer.

"Gee!" He said desperately

"Forgive me now?" I asked, my lips against his neck. He squirmed again.

"Ughhh, yes!" He said, his teeth clenched, fingers still knotted my pathetic excuse for hair. I brought my head up and looked at him lovingly.

"You're adorable." I said simply, pecking him on the lips quickly, letting him out of my grasp.

"Awwh, my tie isn't messed up again, is it?" He giggled and adjusted it a little bit for me.

"nope," he said, "But your hair is a fuckin rats nest.

"Well, so is yours!" I retorted laughing.

"Pshh." We both turned to the mirror, and saw our hair. It really _was_ a pile of crap. Frank sighed. "Shit" he said, dragging out the I. "Hey Gerard, you got a comb on you?" I laughed out loud.

"Hah, you _think_ I do?" He grumbled in response.

"Yeah, yeah, of course you don't."

So we made the best we could with our pathetic hair, and went out once again into the restaurant.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N

**A/N**

**Ooohhh, yayyy, a long one. That's what it looks like on word, anyway.**

**Please review if you read. Tell all your friends -!**

**I'll give you and e-basket of muffins.**

**Gerard's POV**

To our surprise, the place was practically empty, a huge change from it's once ridiculously croded state. We walked back to our table, and instead of Jamia, found a note which I read over Frank's shoulder.

"Frankie-

I'm not quite sure what you two were doing in there, but it sure took a long time." I stifled laughter. I figured it would be a little inappropriate…

"No need to apologize though, I understand you needed to help out Gerard. Anyway, I couldn't wait any longer and had them box the food. I took the car home, so have Gerard give you a lift. And hurry back, I got a really special surprise for you." When Frank's eyes skimmed over that part, I could tell he shivered a little, which made me wonder again about what secret he was obviously keeping from me.

Oh well. I guess I would just have to find out later.

"xoxo, jamia."

After we both finished reading the note, Frankie gave an amused "hmph" and shoved it in his pocket.

I grabbed my keys from the booth and ruffled his hair again.

"come on, Lero," I said, "I'm your ride home." Frankie laughed and mumbled,

"That can be taken _so_ many different ways…" I slapped him on the back of the head.

"Frank Anthony Iero!"

"Whaaatt?" he said, rubbing the place where I had hit him.

"You dirty little boy." I said, to which he laughed again.

"yeah, you'd know."

"Oh shut up!" I started to laugh with him as we grabbed our coats and walked out the door. On our way out, I could've sworn that the hostess who before greeted us so kindly now muttered "faggots" under her breath, but why should I care? I loved him. He loved me. And now, nothing else mattered.

As I was opening the drivers side of my car, (Frank had already jumped in the passenger seat) A thought suddenly struck me

"Hey Frankie?"

"mhm?" he said as he adorably fiddled with his seat belt.

"What do you think Jamia's 'special surprise' is gonna be?" He thought for about five seconds.

"I don't know… and to be honest, I'm not really sure I _want_ to know."

Suddenly, I knew what he was thinking. I shuddered.

"What?" he asked. I fidgeted uncomfortably in my seat.

"err…well…" Frankie grabbed my free hand

"Come on, Gee, you can ask me anything." He said as he looked right into my eyes, which actually made me forget my original question for a moment.

"You wouldn't…would you?"

"Wouldn't what Gerard?" _GAHH._ This so fuckin embarrassing. I fidgeted again and kept my eyes glued to the road, barely paying attention of where I was going I knew the roads so well.

"you wouldn't…uhh…do it…with Jamia…would you?" Good thing it was dark, because my face must've looked like a giant tomato, for lack of a better comparison.

I felt Frankie grab my hand tighter.

"The thought sickens me."

Why was it that whenever I was with him that my head always spun uncontrollably? I wonder if he ever felt the same. I don't think I've ever been in love before…was this what it's like? And that he just happened to love me too seemed like a beautiful coincidence. Then I got a little paranoid. _Was_ it a coincidence? Or was he just humoring me because he's known all along? I argued with myself until I drove up the familiar road to Frank's driveway.

Thanks for the ride, Gee" He said, and kissed me on the cheek.

"Hey, Frankie, wait a sec…" With his hand still on the door handle, he turned his body to me.

"yeah?" I hesitated, trying to find the right words.

"well…did you..did you really mean it..when you said-when you told me that…" He silenced my talking with his lips on mine, putting every single part of his mind and soul into it; and I kissed back just the same.

Then I realized this was Frank's answer, the most meaningful way he could put it, every ounce of his being I could tell screaming "Of course I meant it, dumbass"

I wish that moment wouldn't have ended. That moment of pure sanctity, where everything and everyone in the world seemed as it should be. Everything felt right, everything felt safe, and I had no doubt about who I was or what I wanted. _I was Gerard. I wanted Frank. And I finally had him._

But, Frank soon pulled away, smiled, and bolted out the door. For a few moments I just sat there in his driveway, staring at nothing, absolutely paralyzed, re-living that moment over and over and over. Then, finally, with a lovestruck sigh and a smile that would last me the whole way home, I put my foot on the pedal and drove away.

**Frank's POV**

I stood at my front door for a while, seemingly unable to stop the uncontrollable buzz in my head. It was like I got high off about a million lines, except that I didn't have any resulting brain damage. When I finally opened my door, strangely, I found it was dark. I thought that Jamia would be watching t.v or something like she normally does when she comes over and I'm not around.

"Jamia?" I called out.

"hey Frankie! I'm upstairs, in the bathroom."

"Okay." I trudged up the stairs, my thoughts of Gerard keeping me in a good mood. Being away from him bringing it down a little bit, though.

The only bathroom upstairs was the one in my room, and since I was headed there anyway, I decided to just walk in and flop down on my bed, flipping through the channels on the television.

"God, there's nothing on…" I murmered to myself, the types of shows alternating between kids shows with fifteen year olds wearing a ridiculous amount of makeup and showing off their boobs (or lack thereof, I casually noticed) or Mtv reality shows like "pimp my ride" and I could've sworn I saw ashton kutcher running out of a closet with a camera crew screaming "YOU'VE JUST BEEN PUNK'D". Too bad it was gone when I turned back to look though.

When I finally settled on a Thanksgiving rerun of That 70's show (I had to admit, I have a thing for ashton kutcher) I put my head back, drifting off a little to the happiest thoughts I've had in a pretty long time.

Maybe two seconds away from a beautiful sleep, I was rudely awaken by Jamia pouncing on top of me.

"Hey, you!" She said. _Well, you're in a surprisingly good mood tonight._ I thought dryly. Then she kissed me deeply on the lips before I had a chance to properly respond. When she pulled away, I stared at her wide-eyed.

"wow, what is this?" I said, motioning to her. She had on a skimpy nightgown that she must have bought recently. Her hair was down and elegantly curled.

"It's your surprise!" She beamed.

_I knew it._

Even though this wasn't really like her at all. Normally, Jamia was pretty modest, but I guess she changed just for tonight.

Suddenly, a pang of guilt slapped me in the face.

I guess Jamia really _did_ love me, and I was just about to dump her like that? She had been by my side for three whole years…

"Frankie?" She gave me a worried look, mixed with fear and embarrassment.

"Yeah?"

"Something wrong?" You still seem a little bit off…." I took notice again of her good mood, and decided not to shudder. "Is this too much?" I looked her over again.

Come to think of it, it probably _was_ a little much.

"No, of course not!" I exclaimed, lying through my teeth. What could I say? It was my god-given talent.

She sat up on the end of the bed. "Then what is it?" Even in the dark, I cold tell she was hurt. I pushed back thoughts of "_you deserve it_", but I still couldn't believe what I was about to do. I thought I would be happy right now. "Frank?" Her voice was shaking a little bit. She knew me too well.

_Oh fuck…I can't do this…_

Then I pictured Gerard's face, the face of an angel. Raven black hair, glowing green eyes that have obviously seen too much. I pictured the kiss we shared just outside. How different it was than any onstage frerard, and how it was everything I've ever wanted. And then some.

Then I thought about how one little lack of action could take that all away from me. After 3 ½ years of wishing and dreaming and hoping, I wasn't about to let that get away from me.

"Frank, just say something." She said. I could see from the dim light of the television that she was crying a little. Despite all the things that have happened, I silently said,

_I'm sorry…_ I put it in the most blunt way I could.

"I think I'm gay." She didn't say anything for a long time, maybe five minutes. When she didn't move, didn't talk, didn't even make a gesture to hit me, I was the one to break the silence. "Jamia…?" I said cautiously.

"How long." She said bitterly. I sat up and hugged my knees to my chest, preparing for the worst.

"well…not long exactly…"

"who." I didn't answer. Tears gathering in my own eyes, I pictures his face, and how right at this moment I wanted nothing more than to be with him. "Who, frank."

"Jamia…"

"Dammit, frank, just fucking tell me who!" She was in hysterics and I knew from experienced she was lethal in hysterics.

"Gerard!" I shouted. I then lowered my voice and put my head down in my knees. "I love Gerard."

I was honestly afraid when she got up to turn on the lights, leaving my extremely awkward state exposed.

"So." She said curtly. "What was it you were doing in the bathroom, then, huh, frank?" She started, walking towards me again.

"Nothing, I swear to God! He just got dumped and I wouldn't ever take advantage of him like that!"

"oh, really? Then what took you so long? Were you fucking? Huh?"

"No!" I shouted. By then I had gotten up and had almost been backed into a corner.

The truth is, Jamia and I had never really been in a good relationship. When I asked her out, I really did like her and thought she was an amazing girl, but as we got farther and farther into our relationship, I realized she hit me a lot, and it hurt. I mean, I tried to look past it, but in her eyes I was doing "wrong" things more and more often, and before I knew it I was backed in the corner with her wielding a knife or a bottle or sometime just her fists.

"Shit! No! Jamia, we didn't do anything!" She advanced none the less. This brought back the bad memories of when I was living at home, and I got abused almost every day by my alcoholic mother.

Suddenly I got really chlosterphobic. _Shit, not again, please no…_

"Yeah, right!" she screamed. "You're just a stupid fag! I can't believe I ever trusted you!" she yelled, then slapped me hard.

Maybe I did deserve that, seeing as I told her I was gay on our three year anniversary. But I don't think I deserved to be cut in the arm with her handy-dandy pocket knife that she always carries around in her pocket when she has to discipline me.

Her and my mother would've gotten along well.

I screamed when the blade hit my skin, and soon, the cut (and simultaneously all of my other scars) started to burn underneath my long sleeved collar shirt. "You never fucking loved me, Frank!" She screamed as she cut me on the other side of my arm. Then right on my ribcage. "You never appreciated me!" Blood starts running down the fresh gash on my shoulder, which went a little deep. I cried out and with the little room I had sunk to the floor; that being the last thing I remember before she kneed me in the face and I blacked out.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N **

**Thank you kindly to the people who reviewed )**

**Aaand many apalogies. This chapter kind of sucked. I wrote it late at night. Exhaustion took over at the end.**

**Also, they're doing they're best in school to load us up with homework. So future chapters might be a little delayed.**

**Weeelll, review if you read. And Just know, I adore Jamia and Lyn-z. )**

**I loveeee you !**

**Xxxlorah**

**

* * *

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**Frank's POV**

Fluorescent lights ripped through the small slits in my eyes, encouraging a piercing pain in my head. I shut them tight, trying to remember what happened last night.

My thoughts were interrupted by a hand resting on my shoulder, and in a flash it all came back to me. The fight, cuts, bruises…ashton kutcher?

Now Jamia knew my secret, and I knew I was gonna get it. She was just like my mom. I was never good enough, every sin I had committed was clearly marked on my skin.

I wish my father could have been there to save me. But mother got rid of him soon enough.

"Frankie?" A voice said, jolting me from my thoughts. Feeling a hand on my shoulder, I jumped and screamed, flinching away from the unknown visitor. Tears were streaking down my face. I cried.

"I'm sorry!"

But the voice seemed to be even more scared than I was.

"Frankie? Frankie, what's wrong?" I opened my eyes and saw an angel standing there, beautiful hazel eyes stained red, like it had been crying.

Shit! I'm dead, aren't I? shit, shit, shit, I knew it…

Through my fogged vision, it seemed the light coming from the window this angel stood in front of created some sort of halo, adding to the beauty of it…him.

"Gerard!" I yelled, and grabbed for him, only to be ripped back by the wires attaching me to a beeping machine. aw, fuck! I was in the hospital. And Gerard must have been crying out of worry.

"Frankie!" he exclaimed, coming closer to the hospital bed, carefully sitting on it and hugging me close. I buried my aching head in his chest and just sobbed.

"Gerard, Gerard, I'm so fucking glad it's you! Oh my god…"

I was barely conciouss of what I was saying, just clutching closer to him with each sob that I let through my mouth.

"shhh, it's okay, babe, I'm here, I won't let anyone hurt you."

"too late" I squeaked to which he kissed the top of my head and held me closer.

It took me about eight minutes to get calmed down to the pint of just deep shaky breaths.

"Frankie?" Gerard whispered. I started to feel really weak.

"uhhu?" I tiredly responded. After a few seconds, Gerard was the only thing keeping me from falling back to the pillow, back into my own personal hell.

"Frankie, how did this happen?" that question confused me a little bit. If he didn't know, then how did he know to come here?

"how much do you know?" I asked him, pulling away so I could look into his eyes, which always made me feel a lot better.

"I was the one that found you, and I still don't know shit." he said, seemingly frustrated. "I've been asking everyone around here, everyone I know all day and night, but no one know what happened." I just stared hat him with wide eyes. No one had every really cared about me that much before. Then his eyes started to water up. "I thought I was gonna lose you, frank…" He wiped tears away from his eyes, but more took their places. Then I reached up with my hand to wipe them away.

"You're never gonna lose me, Gerard," I said, "Even if you want to." Then I leaned up and kissed him softly, exhaustion clouding my head, even though my heart kept beating faster, which was now audible because of that fuckin machine I was hooked up to. When Gerard heard it, he started giggling unexpectedly.

"Oh, shut up." I said laughing his smile just widened. He then got a devious look on his face. He looked form me to the machine, then back to me again.

What in the hall-?

My thoughts were halted by him kissing me deep, carefully wrapping him arms around my waist to hold me closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck, opening my mouth when he asked for entrance. With my tongue playing with his, he started to rub my theigh and kiss my neck, causing an (almost) quiet moan. shit, what's he playing at? We're gonna get fuckin kicked out… but I was way too far gone to really care. The heart monitor beeping when insane in the background. Smiling into the kiss, he started to move closer to my crotch, and since I had nothing on except the hospital gown, he got another immediate response.

"oh, shit" I said, biting my lip hard as he went faster. The monitor was seemingly a continuous beep rather than hundreds of lighting fast ones. And since I was in no position to really do anything with me being hooked up and all, it might as well have been some form of wonderful, taunting torture.

"Feeling better?" he whispered.

"shit, this is not fair!" I said through clenched teeth and an almost bleeding lip.

"We can make it more unfair if you want…"

**Gerard's POV**

"ugh, is that physically possible?" I laughed.

"only if you want it enough…." he smiled devilishly. Time to take care of some unfinished business. I smile as he pulled my on top of him, he started to undo my belt and kiss me when suddenly, someone interjected.

"In a hospital bed, really?" Mikey said form the door. "class, all the way, Gerard, really." I looked up to see my brother at the doorway.

"Great timing mikey…" I grumbled, carefully getting off frank, letting him fall bad to the bed. I heard him whine in protest, to which I laughed.

"don't worry," I whispered in his ear, "We'll take care of that later, when the child isn't watching."

"Hey!" Mikey said, "I'm not that much younger than you!"

"So you wanna watch then?" I laughed, and frank let out a giggle. He was so adorable in whatever he did, it was amazing. This kid was really something else.

"ergggg," mikey said, now walking into the room, "you guys are gross! I just wanted to see how Frankie was doing."

"Tired." he replied with a yawn that made my heart melt.

"And Gerard wanted to such things with you in this state?" Mikey asked, mock shock on his face. He knew I did. I he knew how long I"ve loved frank, and last night after I went home I told him all about what happened.

"wait," Frankie said, turning to me, "Does mikey know about…"

"yeah." I answered before he could finish his question. "I told him last night, he's cool with it."

"Good." He said, smiling widely, "At least someone's cool with it." This surprised me.

"Frank, what do you mean by-" But he cut me off.

"don't wanna talk about it." he said curtly, turning his head away, but exposing some nasty looking scars. Had those always been there? Maybe I had just never seem them in the right light…

"frank?"

"I'll explain later, Gee." He said seeming to fight off tears, but let one or two slip. I flashed mikey an uneasy look, and he shrugged. Then he motioned outside, meaning I should probably leave Frank to rest. So, doing what I was told, I gave him a little kiss on the forehead, said I'd talk to him soon and reluctantly walked out into the hall with Mikey.

--

I sighed as I closed the door. Now more than ever it hurt to leave Frank. But at least he was safe now…

flashback to last night

I pulled into Frank's driveway at around 9:30, with a great new idea for a song that couldn't wait. I thought it quite strange, though that his car wasn't in the driveway.

maybe he took Jamia home I thought, inevitably thinking of her surprise for him tonight. I shuddered at the thought, but took comfort in his previous words,

"The thought sickens me." Another lovestruck sigh. Frank was so amazing,and he's finally mine. I felt a little bad for Jamia, though, for just sorta stealing him like that. But what could I do? I was fucking in love.

I knocked on the door.

"Frankie?" I called when no one answered. Well, might as well leave it on the counter or something. Since I knew where his key was, I quickly picked it up and unlocked the door, letting myself inside. I quickly threw my things on the counter and was about to leave when I heard the television on in frank's room. "Frank?" I called again. He never left the t.v on…

I trudged upstairs and knocked on his door. No response. I opened the door to let myself inside, and I was completely horrified by what I saw. Frankie-my Frankie-knocked out on the floor, blooe pouring form wounds seemingly left by a knife. I ran over to his body. "FRANK!" I screamed desperately, shaking his shoulders, tears flowing at a rapid pace down my face. I made a call to 9-1-1 and after hanging up, I sobbed, holding him close, yelling, "please, Frankie, don't die, don't die! Please, oh god, I love you…"

--

"Gerard"? Mikey's interjection steered me away from my memory.

"huh?"

"So…" he started awkwardly, "you and Frank, huh?"

"yeah. Finally." he laughed a little uneasily, but I ignored it.

"hmmm…" he said, sitting down in one of the waiting room chairs.

"what is it?" I sighed. There was obviously something wrong.

"Well…it's just that…what is this going to do to the band? I mean, I know we're not that big or anything, but it's still sort of a commitment, a promise, a-"

"Mikey," I cut in, "I've been imagining this for four years. I've been over countless scenarios, and all of them have involved the band. I think we can handle this." He hesitated, obviously something on his mind, and just looked at me through his thick rimmed glasses through a second. Then he sighed, and said

"okay. Fine."

"you're sure there's nothing else wrong?" He looked the other way and paused again.

"Yeah. I'm sure." _Bullshit._ I was about to press the matter when a nurse in white stepped into the room of anxious visitors.

"Mr. Gerard Way?" she said, looking around the room. I got up and walked over to her.

"Right here. Can I see Frank now?"

"Yes, he's ready to go home now. I'll leave him time to get dressed, then he can be discharged." relief coursing through me, I then thanked her and walked into Frankie's room again.

I walked in cautiously, just in case he was sleeping…which he was. I went over and kneeled by his bedside. A chill of remembrance then came over me; he looked so much like he did last night. His body broken and so calm, yet so distraught…

"Hey, sexy." Frank's voice brought me back to reality. He looked up at me with the most brilliant smile I'd ever seen. I couldn't help but kiss him.

"Hey babe. How're you feeling?"

"Good. Trying to recover from my heartattack." we both laughed

"well," I retorted, "If you would stop being so damn adorable, we wouldn't keep having this problem." He giggled and said,

"I'm sowwy geee" Then he leaned up and kissed me.

"Damn you, Frank Iero!" Suddenly we heard a throat clear at the door. A doctor in white stood in front of us, obviously seeing Frank and I kiss, making him extra awkward, I suppose.

"uhh…" he said, "If Mr. Iero is no longer in need of medical assistance, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Damn homophobes. Right then I said, "Okay," then out of need to push this guys buttons kissed frank again long and hard. He was surprised, but he kissed back. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the guy mutter something like

"Damn faggots" then turn on his heels and leave.

"what was that for?" Asked Frank. I grinned.

"homophobes are just too fun to piss off. Can you blame me?" He rolled his eyes playfully.

"If you're planning on pissing off all of the homophobes in this town, this time next week there'll be a mob with pitchforks and all kicking us out of here."

What was sad was that Frank was right. This shitty little town was plastered with billboards practically screaming "We're homophobic, gay bashes, come live here!" It was disgusting, really. I always got beat up in high school for it. Finally, I sighed.

"Come on, let's get you out of here."

While Frank got dressed, I faced the door, looking out of the small window. The homophobic doctor was talking with mikey.

"You related to those fags in there?" I heard him say. I could feel my face get red with anger.

"yeah." Mikey replied, seemingly quite annoyed. He always was when people awsked me something like that. The doctor chuckled.

"I feel sorry for you." He said. I expected Mikey to retaliate, to blow up at him, defending me like he always did..at least when I was around. Instead, he looks away and bluntly replied,

"yeah.' This made my blood turn to ice in my veins. What had he just said? He's actually taking this shit?

"You're not one of the, are you?"

"No." He said, quite defensively.

"Well, good" the doctor replied.

"yeah." Then, after a moment, he shook his head and murmured,

"Those guys really live in the wrong town." And with that, he walked down the hallway. Mikey just rolled his eyes.

"tell me about it."

The ice in my veins melted and turned to fire.

**Frank's POV**

As I finished buttoning the (now clean) shirt I was wearing yesterday (disappointedly fingering the rips and tears) I noticed Gerard balling his fists so hard that his knuckles turned white. Instantly, I backed up a little.

"Gee?" I said a little shakily. He didn't respond. "Gerard…?" He didn't talk back to me, but instead screamed

"FUCK!" and kicked a hole in the wall. I could feel the blood drain from my face as I backed further into the wall. He then turned to me and said,

"Come on, Frank. Let's get the fuck out of here." But before I moved, I had to ask,

"Gee, what's going on?" He spun around again, with the most sincere look in his eyes I've ever seen.

"Just know this Frank: Whatever you do, you have to be yourself, don't take anyone's shit, and never **ever** let them take you alive." I was kind of confused since this wasn't really relevant, but before I could say anything, he fiercly opened the door, muttering something like,

"My own fuckin' brother…" What about Mikey? What's going on? I quickly followed him out of the room, wincing a little as the fabric of my shirt tugged at my stitches and newly formed scars.

As he flew past, Mikey got up saying,

"we ready to go?" But Gerard would have none of it.

"Frank and I are leaving, You can just do whatever the fuck you want, Mikey." He looked taken aback.

"Excuse me Gerard?" Gerard stopped walking and spuna round to face his brother.

"you heard me. Now fuck off if you know what's good for you."

"wait, Gerard!" Mikey yelled, "What the fuck is this all about?" What did I do wrong?" This made Gerard's face red with what looked like pure rage. To me anyway. And I had seen my fair amount of rage. Backing against a wall again, I watched them fight from afar.

"Why did you tell me you're a fucking homophobe, Mikey? Why would you lie to me like that?" He shouted. That's when Mikey came to his own defense.

"Because you're my fucking brother, Gerard! How was I supposed to tell my gay brother that I hate gay people?!"

That one hurt even me. Did that mean mikey hated me? He was my second best friend in the world. I trusted him with almost everything.

"You could've just been fuckin honest, mikey! If I knew you hated me, then I would have ever trusted you! Or was that your intention? To just get all my secrets and blackmail me?" It actually really hurt to see the two brothers fight. They were always the best of friends; if it weren't for that they looked sort of similar, you would never be able to tell that they were brothers, anyway. They got along too well. And now that was basically all lost…

Maybe if I had never comforted Gerard at the restaurant, if I had never approached him like that in the parking lot, if I never even mentioned a "someone else" to him, never told jamia…

Tears overflowed my eyes.

_Shit,_

It was all my fault.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N

So, needless to say, I haven't been on here in like 298374 years, and am waaaay behind.

Also needless to say, I hate school with a burning firey passion.

Sorry this chapter is a little short, I'll get updates sooner than last time.

Anywayss, thanks to those who reviewed (sorry if I don't really reply, but please know it's really appreciated). And, without further ado, chapter…7, is it?

-----

Frank's POV

The car ride back to my house was pretty much silent except for the occasional "Fuckin' slow drivers" and the radio playing stupid mainstream shit in the background. Neither of us bothered to change it, though, we were both too lost in our thoughts and problems.

So, Mikey was homophobic. I couldn't believe it. No wonder he never playfully teased me and Gerard like Ray and Bob did (even though they had no idea). They were always saying stuff like

"Geez, get a room" or "psh. Might as well be married." But of course, it was all in good fun.

That made me wonder a lot of things. What about Alicia, Mikey's fiancée? We'd all grown pretty close, too. Did she hate us? What's going to happen to the band now, if the singer and the bassist hate each other?

"we're here." Gerard sighed, startling me a little. Don't ever say it's impossible to look out a window and not see anything. The car stopped as we pulled into my driveway, but I still didn't get up; instead, I folded my hands in my lap, looked down and bit my lower lip.

"Gee?" I said timidly, incase he was still angry.

"yeah, Frankie?"

"I'm sorry." I looked up at him with tears in my eyes, and his expression of concentrated apathy turned to confusion.

"Huh? For what?" I looked back down again, trying to hide the fact that I was breaking inside.

"I'm sorry that I caused the fight between you and Mikey. Maybe if I had just kept my mouth shut at band practice, or maybe if I hadn't confronted you at the restaurant or told Jamia…"

"Wait," Gerard said, "you told jamia?"

_Shit._ I had said too much. I had no idea where Jamia was now, so even if I told Gerard and he tried to help, there was still a possibility she would come back.

"yeah." I said, barely above a whisper.

"How did she take it?" I looked out the window, not that there was anything interesting; I just wanted to avoid his gaze. I muttered something unintelligible in a futile attempt to get him off the subject, but he was more persistent than I would have liked. He put his index finger under my chin and tilted my head up so I was looking right into his eyes. God knew I couldn't refuse his touch.

"Frank…" He whispered. My eyes started to fill up gain. I didn't want to keep anything from him. But I was so scared that I would get more hurt- maybe even killed- if I said anything to anyone. I responded with a pitiful whimper. "yeah?"

_I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not…_

"What happened?" Against my will, it took me about five seconds to fully break down in his arms, which was actually quite uncomfortable since we were still sitting in the cramped car.

"Gerard," I sobbed into his shoulder, weakly clutching to the fabric of his shirt. "Please don't let her hurt me anymore…" Throughout my whole episode, Gerard was just kissing the top of my head, cooing in my ear,

"Shh, it's okay, babe, I'm here, okay? I won't let her hurt you again…" Just like he was doing in the hospital. Ugh, why did I have to be such a pansy?

Soon, my breathing steadied so we were just sitting there, me pathetically clinging to him, and him holding on to me like I was going to slip away if he let me go.

"Frankie," eh whispered into my hair, "how long as she been doing this to you?"

I shifted and clung a little closer.

"Since three months after we started dating." I could feel his body tense up and if physically possible, he held me closer, gently pulling me onto his lap, carefully avoiding the stering wheel. Luckily, I was small enough to fit.

"I'm so sorry…" He whispered, resting his head on mine. Hearing that, I pulled away from him just enough so that I could look at him.

"Gee, it's no your fault, it's mine."

"What? How is it your fault?" Honestly, I didn't have an answer.

"I dun' know…" I said, going back into hysterics. "Is' Jus' that somehow is' always my fault." He pulled me into a hug again.

"No Frankie, none of this is your fault, you were the victim here, alright? If it's anyone's fault, which it is, it's hers."

Gerard's POV

Holding Frank tight again, we just sat there, lost in our thoughts, I couldn't believe Jamia would do that to him. And for 2 ½ years? My body nearly started to shake with rage. I swear to God, if I ever see that bitch again, I'll-

Speak of the devil.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N

So, how was that cliffhanger there?

*insert smiley face here, because it always gets messed up on fanfiction*

Anyway, here's chapter 8.

*By the way, for all you used fans, did you hear they have a new album next year?!

I'M PUMPED. If you go on their myspace, then the first track they have up there is a new song. It's truly amazing.

Xxx

**Gerard's POV**

"Frank…" I said quietly. Still not looking up, he said,

"Yeah, Gerard?"

"Uhhh…" I trailed off as my eyes followed frankie's car pulling into the driveway, blocking us in. When I didn't respond, Frank looked up, and upon setting his on the car behind us, the little remaining color in his face completely drained.

"Shit…she must have stolen my car, too…" Then looking at me with the most heart-breaking expression, he said, "Please don't let her take me, Gee…"

And right then I had more strength and incentive to keep him safe than I ever thought possible, and staring back at him with a gut feeling that I would give my own life and own soul and everything for him, I nearly whispered,

"I won't. I won't ever let her hurt you again, Frankie, I promise."

And with that, I carefully put Frankie back in the passenger's seat and opened my own door, standing face to face with the devil itself.

"Hey, Fag." She sneered when I stepped out of the car.

"Hey, bitch." I tauntingly replied. Even though my eyes were completely fogged with rage and my heart was racing with adrenaline, I wasn't so blind I didn't see the tiny metal object wielded at her side.

"You mind backing away from the car, Gerard?"

_Psh. Over my dead body, you whore._ I thought. Not really paying attention to the fact that she was perfectly capable of making that possible.

"I would mind, actually, so I'm not going to." I could've sworn she was trying to burn a hole through my stomach with her eyes.

If looks could kill…

We'd both be dead on the spot.

"Get out of the way, Gerard. I didn't come here to kill you, but if I have to, I will."

That's when it actually clicked in my head. She wanted to KILL Frankie She probably couldn't finish the job because I showed up. I quickly flashed a glance to the car. Frank was in the back seat, his palms up against the window, watching us, terror written on his features, somehow paler behind the glass.

Frank's POV

Please tell me this is all a nightmare. Just an awful dream, and that in five minutes I'll wake up back in my hospital bed.

But as soon as I saw Jamia pull the knife that I was so familiar with out of her sleeve and pointed it at Gerard, I knew this wasn't a dream. I also knew that if I didn't stop her, she would kill the one thing that really mattered to me.

When I saw Gerard flash a glance at me, I couldn't accept that it would be my last. This was the chance I have to prove to him that I can be strong, I can protect him, too. So, I quietly slipped out of the car, and not closing the door, I held my head up, ready to face whatever fate held.

"Hah. Well, you're sure smarter than you look, Frankie. Now at least two people don't have to die today." She said to me menacingly as I approached the growingly chaotic scene. Gerard spun around.

"Frank, what are you doing?" he was obviously scared I would get hurt. Fuck, _I_ was scared I would get hurt. But this was _my_ battle. Gerard didn't deserve to die. He had too much to live for. Me, on the other hand? Nothing, except for him. And if he was gone, I'd be quick to follow anyway, so it's sort of a win-win, right?

"I can take care of this, Gee. I'm not scared of here anymore." I stepped in front of him. Jamia scoffed.

"Hah! Well, you should be, you fag. You're gonna pay for wasting three fucking years of my life!"

That's when I snapped. I wasn't used to being called a fag (yet, I guess) But damn, it got annoying fast.

I lunged at her unrepentantly and automatically grabbed for the wrist wielding the familiar weapon, holding it away from both our bodies. Before I could go any further, though, her fist (which happened to be full of rings_ collided with my cheek, and I was forced to stumble back. _That_ was sure going to hurt later.

_If there was a later…_

Gerard's POV

Oh, that just isn't gonna cut it. No abusive bitch was going to hit my Frankie and get away with it. I watched as frank staggered back, clutching the side of his face, his mouth beginning to fill with blood. I thought he was going to fall over, but he just went right back at her and punched her in the stomach, grabbing the knife and chucking it to the forest.

Without her noticing, I slipped behind her, and then wanting to cause her as much pain as she caused him, I tugged on a fistful of her hair so forcefully, I thought it was going to rip right off.

Her scream of profanities echoed throughout the entire city. Or that's what it seemed like, anyway. If me and Frankie's life wasn't in danger, I would covered my ears, probably laughing while I did so.

Too bad I couldn't. After the scream was silenced, my ears started ringing violently. I bet hers were too, but that didn't stop her from doing what she was going to do next.

Frank's POV

I couldn't believe Gerard. He was so amazing, like an angel….that's been allowed to beat people up.

But not even him could protect me from the barrel of the gun I was not staring down.

Gerard's POV

Time seemed to freeze. Jamia had pulled out a gun from seemingly nowhere, and pulled it on Frankie, making me stop in my tracks. With eyeliner smudged all over her furious and already blood-stained face, she looked like a fucking maniac.

Frank's POV

"Good boy, Gerard…" she said when Gerard completely froze. Advancing on me with the gun, she addressed both of us. "Now, I'm sure someone heard my scream and the police are probably on their way, so I'm gonna have to do this quick…"

Pointing the gun directly at my head, she turned the safety off, her finger on the trigger.

"This is your last mistake, Frank." She said.

"No!" I heard Gerard scream before she pulled the trigger back all the way, and a deafening CRACK was ringing through the whole neighborhood.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N

I personally kinda like this chapter

This is dedicated to weeblinkingstar. Cuz she's awesome, and comments all my *if that smiley didn't show up, insert it here

Gerard's POV

"Gerard!" I heard Frank scream after the gun went off.

But he wasn't screaming from pain, I realized, he hadn't been hit. I looked down at my shoulder.

_Holy shit, I'm bleeding!_

*flashback*

_That bitch was holding a gun to my Frankie's head. All the blood had drained from his face, he was shaking slightly, but still trying to look strong._

"_This is your last mistake, Frank…"_

_"NO!" I screamed. Four years of chasing for Frank… I wasn't allowing myself to give it all up now. So, out of desperity, I ran up in front of her, whacking the barrel to the right, and falling to the ground._

"Gerard!" I heard him scream again, running over to me, lying in a puddle of my own blood on Frank's driveway. Every noise seemed to be accentuated and cramming into my head all at once. It was like having an awful hangover, except you were lying in your own blood, depending on anything and everything to stop the burning sensation where the bullet hit.

I prayed it wasn't still there. I would do anything to avoid that hospital.

"Gerard, oh my God, please, don't die!" hmm…why had those words sounded so familiar? I couldn't exactly think straight. All I could focus on was that I was too tired, I could barely keep my eyes open.

"Frankie…?" I groaned, my eyes gradually becoming weights too heavy to hold. I wondered aloud how much blood I'd lost. Frank seemed to choke on his own words. I winced. I wish I wasn't the reason he was crying.

"A lot.." he cried, "But not too much. If we can get you to the hospital quickly, then.."

"No!" I shouted "I can't go back there!"

"But Gee…!"

"Frank, please, I can't go back, please, _you_ have to stop the bleeding!"

Frank's POV

What had he just said?

"Wha…what?" he winced, failing to keep tears from overflowing from his eyes, clutching his arm so tight, his knuckles turned different colors.

"Frankie you have to stop the bleeding" Gerard had just literally put his fading life into my hands. I had to save it, no matter what it took…

I looked up to see Jamia being taken away by a policeman, laughing crazily, a neighbor filling out a report for another policeman. God bless those neighbors. But that's not what I had to focus on at the moment.

Before the cops saw me and Gerard and forced him to a hospital, I picked him up and carried him inside, kicking open the screen door. I bet I must have looked stupid carrying him since he was obviously bigger than me, but really, I was strong and he was pretty lightweight.

After kicked the door closed, I went to the nearest couch and set him down. I felt like I was racing against time…and I was losing. Tears of worry and hopelessness started to flow down my cheeks as I got a shitload of cloths from my kitchen.

_No, Fran, you have to be strong, prove to him you can do this, his life is depending on it…_

I kneeled beside Gerard, still struggling futally to keep his eyes open.

"I have no idea how I'm going to do this…" I whispered more to myself than to him, "But I swear to God I will…", I said balling up the cloth and pressing it down hard over the wound.

After about a minute or so of doing this, talking to him and making sure he was conscious all the way, I heard him start to sing something.

_Can you hear me? Are you near me? _

_Can we pretend to leave and then, we'll meet again when both our cars collide…_

I could hear that he was regaining strength. He kept singing.

_What's the worst that I could say? Things are better if I stay,_

_So long, and goodnight,_

"So long and goodnight…"I finished, completing the tune as he finally stopped bleeding after around ten minutes.

"Frankie?" he said tiredly. I don't think I've ever seen him this tired. He had one hell of an excuse, though.

"hmmm?" I said, leaning in.

"Thank you" he said, a weak smile lighting up his face.

"Anytime" I chuckled. We were both just glad it was over. "I love you, Gee."

"I lu' y' too, Frank" he replied, slurring his words.

And, finally, he closed his eyes, sleep taking control, and I curled up on the couch beside him, going into the most wonderful dream I'd had in a long time.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N

I forgot how I ended the last one.

And I'm too lazy to look

So I'm just going to assume we're on, what, ten?

again, thanks immensely to those of you who update. I may not always reply because I'm always short on time these days, but I hope you know it's appreciated3

Yaaaay, hope you like this one.

The next few chapters I kind of based on the song "alive with the glory of love" by Say Anything

* * *

Oh, the joy of the ten seconds after you wake up where you don't have any recollection of what happened the day before.

At this point, all I knew was that I was cuddled up against Gerard, my hands around his waist, our legs intertwined, maybe as close as physically possible, but still not close enough. The only thing I could hear was Gerard's heavy breathing, obviously nowhere near the point of waking up. And I liked it that way. I could lie there for hours, just watching him sleep; Breathing through his mouth with just enough force so that the hair in his face flew up just slightly before returning to its original place as he exhaled.

_RING!_

That certainly made me jump. That phone was such a bitch.

I unwillingly untangled myself from Gerard (feeling ridiculously sore) and stumbled sleepily over the phone

"mhm?" I mumbled tiredly, closing my eyes and leaning against the counter of my kitchen.

"Frank!" Mikey's shouts jutted my eyes open again.

"Uh yeah, hey, Mikey." Then I remembered Gerard and Mikey's fight at the hospital. My eyes widened.. "Oh..uh..Mikey, why are you calling?" I heard him sigh heavily on the other line.

"Frank, I need to speak to my brother. Now. I looked over at Gerard's sleeping figure, which had still not stirred, and suddenly got defensive.

"Why?" He doesn't want to talk to you." I could almost hear Mikey shooting daggers at me through the phone.

"Look. I get it. He's really pissed at me. But I just need to tell him something, alright?"

IT was my turn to sigh.

"Listen, Mikey. Gerard really needs his rest. I mean, he's just been shot and…"

"What?" He nearly shrieked, making me wince. "Shot?! By who?!"

"Uhm…by jamia…" I said hesitantly, inching around the fact that he took the bullet for me, which I knew would just make him even angrier. According to him, no one would ever be good enough for his big brother. And who was I really to disagree with him? I think the same thing, but by some divine intelligence…

"What the fuck?!" He screamed, "Why the hell would she do that? Where the fuck did she even get a gun?!"

His question made me shiver in remembrance. I remember the first time she threatened to kill me with that thing. We were in my room having a conversation about the presidential election or something totally pointless, when apparently I said something wrong. Because the next thing I knew, I was up against the wall, her holding a tight grip on my neck, while forcing her shiny new toy into my mouth.

"Excuse me?" She had said.

"Yhrrt!" I shouted, my voice being muffled by the deadly metal. She then ripped it out. "Nothing! You're right!" I screamed, tears of raw fear overflowing me.

"Thought so." She chirruped, spinning the gun and putting it back up her sleeve.

"Frankie?" A soft voice said. I guess my eyes were starting to water, because Gerard soon got a panicked look on his face. When had he gotten up? "Frankie, baby, what's wrong? Who's on the phone?" He pulled me into the best hug he could manage (with his arm and all) before I was able to hand him the phone and utter

"It's Mikey"

**Gerard's POV**

"It's Mikey." Upon hearing my younger brother's name, everything came rushing back to me, filling my head with the unwanted information. Not nearly as angry as I had been yesterday (although still a little steamed) I took the phone from Frank's trembling hand and whispered a string of swears under my breath before muttering,

"Yeah?"

"Gerard! Christ, are you okay? Frank said you got shot by jamia! What the fuck happened?! It's his fault, isn't it?! I fucking knew it, I knew…"

"Mikey!" I yelled, "Holy shit! Calm down, I'm fine! And don't you dare pin this on Frank. It was my decision to…"

"What, Gerard, get shot? No, it was the person's who shot you. And Frank probably planned it all!"

"Mikey, what the fuck? You've acted like you've never met him before. What, are you going crazy, or are you choosing to be an ignorant prick? I took the bullet for Frank." Upon saying those words, I could feel frank cringe and begin to softly cry at the other end of the room. I panicked a little, walking over and quickly pulling him into my embrace, snaking my arm around his waist as he buried his face in my neck.

"Thank you, Gerard." He whispered, his lips moving against my skin. I kissed the top of his head in response.

"Well, what the fuck did the doctors say to that? Hopefully they gave you the address to a nice mental asylum!"

"Fuck off!" I shouted into the receiver, hugging Frank closer, my heart beating faster at the realization,

_He's finally mine. And I won't let anything hurt him now. Not Frankie…my Frankie._ He whimpered a little, hugging me around my middle. I could tell he was scared. I was, too. "There were no fucking doctors, Mikey." There was a slight deafening silence on the other end, then he exploded.

"No doctors, Gerard?! Are you shitting me right now? You got _shot_ and you didn't go to the hospital?!" I shifted uncomfortably and then retaliated,

"It's none of your business, Mikey, so just fuck off. Frank saved my life."

"You know what, Gerard?" I've been avoiding this as long as humanly possible. First the drugs, and now this? Let me guess, you're not clean are you?"

"Fuck you, Mikey, you don't know anything." I screamed.

"I know enough, Gerard, and I'm calling the fucking cops. They'll take you to fucking rehab and god knows what'll happen to your boyfriend." I could feel my face going white. I'm not going to go back there. Not again.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N

For some reason I just like having a/ns at the top of each of my chapters

Hehe, sorry for leaving you guys hanging there, but keep in mind I only do those kinds of things when I know I'm going to do some major updancing soon

Yes, I just said updance. Gerard's word. lmao, I love that man.

Also, for some of my more serious work, I'm thinking of making a mibba.

If you have one, or have had experience with one, I would appreciate it barrelfuls if you could give me feedback.

Okay, so, yeah, here we go.

Onward to chapter eleven!

**Gerard's POV**

"You'll never take me alive, you twat!" I yelled and hung up the phone, already rushing upstairs to pack a quick bag. Knowing mikey, they're on their way right now. "Frank!" I need some clothes!" I shouted, bounding up the stairs. He ran after me.

"What? Why? Gee, what happened?"

"I'll explain it all later. But right now we both just need to get out of here. Mikey called the cops and…"

"What?"

"Yeah. And they're gonna take me to rehab and …"

"Wait, Gerard, rehab? I thought you were fucking clean!"

"Ugh, there's not time! We need to…" Then we both cut short as we heard a rapid pounding at the door.

_Thanks Frank for taking a house so close to the police station…_ Gerard thought a little bitterly. But in the back of his mind he knew it wasn't frank's fault at all, it was his. He wasn't sure how, but he knew he really fucked something up this time.

"Open up!" we heard a gruff voice call from outside. "We've got a warrant for arrest for a Frank Iero and Gerard Way!"

**Frank's POV**

_Shit._ What's happening? Why were there policemen practically banging down my front door looking to arrest me and Gerard?

"Gerard…" I whispered, the ratio of panic to blood becoming very uneven flowing through my veins. "What the fuck is going on?"

"listen," He said, mirroring my frightened expression, "Mikey knows what happened, he called the cops to send me to rehab, because I'm guessing he also told them about my previous drug problem, and they're here to arrest you, because Mikey told them that you were to blame for me getting shot."

"But why would Mikey do that? He of all people should know I would never…"

"Questions later," Gerard hurriedly said, "We just have to get out of here. Now, I don't care what happens to me," He continued, holding my hand right, "But I won't let them take you Frank, alive or…" His words got caught in his throat, "Otherwise."

"Okay, Gerard, but promise me one thing." I could hear the policemen start to ram down the door.

"Yes, anything." We heard the door break in a mass of wood.

_Damn. That thing was expensive, too._

I touched my lips quickly to Gerard's as panic started to take over even faster, sending my brain into complete overdrive.

"Don't forget I'll always love you. Always have, and always will. Got it?"

"I won't forget, I promise."

We could hear them bounding up the stairs. They must have had heavy boots on, and they must be doing absolute wonders for my wooden steps…It wounded like they were also carrying something overbearingly heavy, but we weren't going to stick around to find out what it was.

"Quick, in here!" I whispered, locking my door to delay them and running to my bathroom. I could sense Gerard following me, so I wasted no time in looking back. When we were both inside, I closed the door and locked that one, too.

_That should buy just enough time…_ I had already had a plan in mind.

I quickly opened the window and peered won into the fading light of our seemingly normal Jersey afternoon.

**Gerard's POV**

I stood behind Frank, soon realizing what he was planning to do.

"Holy fuck, we'll be killed…" I could help but saying under my breath.

"We _may_ get killed…" Frank corrected me, "But we don't have any time to think about this, and it's better than living without you, Gerard. Now come on, There's a bush down there waiting for our asses."

And with that, he closed his eyes and, taking one last glance at me, he jumped. I almost screamed, but instead just jumped out the window after him, the thought of being without him my motivation to not turn and run.

_Oh, fuck, I hope he got out of the way…_

But I was relieved when the only thing I ended up killing by my fall was the bush I landed so gracefully on. My back was sure gonna start to hurt like a bitch later, but I couldn't concentrate on that now. I got up, not bothering to brush the dirt off of my jeans and shirt, because brilliant idea had just hit me like a slap in the face.

"Frankie!" I exclaimed quietly, not risking to be heard by the agitated officers out front. "I've got a perfect idea of where we can go!" He looked at me with wonder in his gorgeous brown eyes, but didn't pause to think about it. We could hear shouts of "They're gone! How the fuck did they get out?" From the house above, signaling me to grab Frank's hand and lead both of us running discreetly through Frank's neighborhood.

I knew _exactly_ where I was going.

**Frank's POV**

"Gee," I started, struggling to catch up with him, even though we were still hand in hand, "Gerard, where are we going?" He didn't look back, but said to the imaginary figure in front of him,

"I'll tell you once we get there, you'll see." Inwardly, I got a little frustrated. This wasn't some fucking surprise party. We were running for our freedom, possibly our life. But this was no time to get hasty now. Gerard knows what he's doing…I hoped.

"Okay."

We were running for God only knows how long, until I couldn't do it anymore. It must have been at least an hour of just straight sprinting as our lives depended on it, but I was soon faced with my own mortality when the adrenaline in my veins started to run out. And fast.

"Fuck!" I said as I let go of Gerard's hand and tripped over my own two feet.


End file.
